social hell

So the block party is done, but the detritus of it is not gone. Yesterday I overheard this exchange with G and neighbor boy.

"Can you play with me?" G asked.

"I have to go watch my sister play softball" (not true, G asked his sister 5 minutes later and she was going to play with friends 'but would play with him later'--said only because I was sitting there).

"You're not doing it now, can you play with me?"

"Well, I have to go set up a playdate with H (boy across the street)."

"Can I play too?"

"No."

I whisked G off and took him to a playground he likes, then we went to Target and Costco. We talked through some of what happened, but he's hurt.

DH reported that he tried to get Nic outside to play while we were gone, but he didn't want to be outside. "He thinks the other kids own the neighborhood and that in the house is safe," he sighed. "What do we do?"

I've tried to make it so that it didn't matter if these brats played with my kids or not. They have plenty of people we meet up with elsewhere. BUT the reality is this:

They don't get asked over after school. Kids don't knock for them.

It doesn't matter how much work I put into trying to make it not matter. It still matters to them. And I just don't know what to do about that.