And so it goes.....

So at 4 pm I get a call from a mom who hems and haws and tells me Nic's language is a problem, that he was cursing at her son.

Hmm.

I told her that it was unlikely that he would do this unprovoked. Just then, Nic bursts in crying, telling me that B and another boy "a boy in a blue sweater," was picking on him.

The line went quiet, then she yelled her son's name. "I'll call you back."

So I get from Nic that he was cornered and harassed for a second day running by B and this other kid.

Mom calls me about 10 minutes later to apologize.

After hemming and hawing for an hour, I called B's mom. Told her what happened.

She called me back to tell me that B told her that Nic started it. And licked him.

I tell her I'll call her back.

What I had gotten so far was that B blocked Nic into the seat, and Nic told me 'he had an idea' to get free, and licked B, which sounds like something he'd do.

So I called B's mom and said, "Look, basically two stories against one here, I'll talk to Nic about not licking people, but please tell B to stop following Nic around."

She said she would.

Nic is bound and determined to go to the principal--and I realize he might get detention, but I kind of think it wouldn't be a bad thing.

It does bother me that B is a liar. And it bothers me that he will probably get Nic in trouble, but Nic will have to learn how to negotiate this stuff. I have to sit on my hands.

I hate it. But I have to.

The other kid's story does corroborate with Nic's hopefully that will be enough.

Yeah, dopey me. I always expect the truth to will out. Except it doesn't, always.

So it's 9:05 am

and Nic has ostensibly run his errand. If he has, I will get a phone call, oh, at about 11:30.

I get that kids will be kids. But what I don't get is that they repeatedly harass my kid--in spite of warnings. What the hell? Are they that hard up in the self respect department that they have to beat up on my kid to feel better about themselves?

I admire the grace with which Nic is handling this. But geez, does his grace and sense of self worth have THAT much of a detrimental effect on these hoodlums?

All we can do is keep on doing what we do. But support from the parents involved would be nice.

The words "Service Project" pop into my head. I'm thinking if these kids have to do some time interacting with special needs kids, that might be better than in school suspension.

As usual, I'll be waiting and seeing. And scheming.

In the meantime, have to finish this project. I'm so close to done. I can knock it out today. I can.

Okay, Bullies, Time's Up!

Nic is going to the principal again tomorrow because the same damn kids keep harassing him.

I think hubby is going to make a house call, as well.

I am really irritated that this persists. The kids clearly aren't intimidated by the consequences, so I am thinking it is time to up the stakes.

(Putting concerned--or perhaps overly UNCONCERNED parents on notice--fix this or expect it to get dealt with by in school suspensions)

Nic is dealing with this well, but why should he be dealing with it at all?

Spent today at a funeral and with the bereaved. Tomorrow I'll be back on the stick trying to get a place for the Special Olympic team that was displaced by financial ruin to swim. Already putting pieces in place for both boys' placements next year.

Ugh. And I am losing my voice on top of everything. I hope to ship my article tomorrow and get rolling on some new projects.

Happy holidays

It's been a nice week off, but reality recommences in less than 48 hours.

Which is fine, I'm ready.

So this year I am going to procrastinate less and get things done a bit more quickly and efficiently. And I am getting back to my regularly scheduled clothes size (not too far off and doable, thanks to the Wii Fitness kit I got for Christmas--I've already logged 12 hours and lost 2 lbs)

Nic spent most of the time off computer, which is good. They've both done a lot of reading this past week. Not much in the way of socializing but that's fine. I still have to work out the pool problem. I guess I'll deal with that this week.

I want to have my article shipped by Wednesday. And hopefully, I'll be ahead of the curve for the rest of the year.

Personal relationships--meh, I'm in a good balance coming in. I need to spend more solo time with hubby, so I will work on making that happen.

I don't take anyone for granted. I don't plan on changing that.

Looking Back, Looking Ahead

As a good friend of mine pointed out this past week, I really grew up this year.

So, in keeping with that spirit, I vow to continue to be honest with myself, compassionate with others, and to show mercy when it can and should be offered.

I will continue to cherish and accentuate all the positives in my life with an eye toward improving all that I can improve about myself. While I can't promise to stop procrastinating, I am going to make a good faith effort to try.

And I am going to try to be more patient.

Maturity Rocks!

Having spent most of my life coming to grips with the fact that my head just isn't wired the same way as everyone else's, it's kind of nice realizing that the kids and I aren't so different from everyone else, after all.

Yesterday, my neighbor called to tell me that a group of the bus stop moms were going out for dinner and a movie, would I like to come?

After I picked my jaw up off the floor, I quickly cleared it with hubby and helped figure out the when and where of it. Then the boys and I went out to donate the 10 bags of toys I sorted and bagged over the last month and went to Costco for a very late lunch and shopping.

(There went dinner, so I drank while everyone else ate, but I was totally okay with that, because remember: I am different and cool like that.)

I don't think I was mature enough to do this with this crowd 5 years ago. But last night was nice; six of us sat around and took turns dipping into different conversations. And as I sat there, the lessons of my sons' inclusion in their school, in the neighborhood, finally sunk in. My kids are more alike than different from the rest of their kids--hell, I always knew this on some level.

But I always thought *I* was so different. And the reality is, I'm not, really.

I was quite happy to just sit and listen. But one after another, each of the women at the table took turns asking me about myself, my family, the kids, what we do, and even though we as a family are not *quite* as integrated into the fold as the rest of the people representing their families at the table, it's a huge step ahead of where we were even three months ago.

And the movie was fun.

It was a lovely evening.

Bigger than a Bread Box

Our day after Christmas was pretty much Christmas minus the unwrapping. There is nothing in the universe nicer than not having to BE anywhere.

Eventually, we all got a little stir crazy, so we got dressed. Hubby took the kids to the library; I told them to meet me at church when they were done, since I had to lector.

Fr. M was clearly bothered by something--even in joking around before mass, there was an unhappy edge to it.

I lectored, and hubby and boys showed up during the homily (and I was glad I didn't go with them to the library). Nic sat with me, and I saw hubby and G out in the congregation when I did the petitions.

The homily took me back a little. It was not scripted, and whatever he was feeling was pretty raw. It was an act of bravery, and he got his point across. (To me, anyway, but he always does).

After, the boys stopped over to see Fr. M, who clearly was happy to see them.

I asked him if he was okay, and he replied that he understood the torment my kids must go through, being different, being teased, and related a story about a relation he must have seen over the Christmas holiday.

OH.

So we had a micro counseling/bull session, wherein I told him that everyone has issues, that life is hard for everyone in different ways, and we all have different crosses to bear. "If it's easy, it's probably wrong, it's that simple," I told him.

He laughed, and it was a real laugh, as if I were able to physically lift the burden off his shoulders.

Some gifts are too big to be wrapped. And usually they are the ones that get missed altogether.

Unless, of course, it's something in particular you are looking for.