Thursday, December 4, 2008

It's a Faith Thing

It's been an eventful 48 hours.

Where we are at this moment: it is unclear when or if nephew will show up to pick up and deliver MIL to her rightful residence. Adding to the fun is the fact that DH is somewhere to the north and west. Possibly at Costco. But we are not sure, since he left his phone plugged in here to this outlet, where it is not doing him much good.

MIL tried calling him repeatedly. Until I pointed his phone ringing on the chair across the room.

She started to admonish me for this, but thought the better of it. Good for her. She's figuring it out.

Necessity compelled me to speak with Perky this pm. She parked herself in my driveway while I was talking to G's bus driver. Trying to think if I gave her any ammo; it wasn't a bad conversation, but I always suspect she's on a fishing expedition to tease out something to discuss with Capri2.

You know what, I don't even know why I devote any bandwidth to this. She talks about everyone to everyone. Leave it there.

Nic owes me language arts homework. I'll sit on him in another 10 minutes to get that done.

A Christmas card from an unexpected source came today. I think for some odd reason that it will have some company in the coming weeks. It'll be interesting to see who else I hear from.

Poetic justice comes in a variety of sizes, shapes, colors and flavors. Savory irony is my favorite.

And I had lunch with a good friend today. I met my brother on Tuesday. It's been a good week to connect, reconnect and realign. I have a job on my hands straightening out my life sitch. It's not bad--DH and I have arrived onto the same page in different ways and different times, but we are here, and it's working out.

But I sketched out all my commitments--the work, volunteer, church stuff--and add to it my boys''s all gotten a little out of control. I tend to over commit because 1) I never turn down work 2) a lot of causes I care about are tied up directly to my kids and their services, so I am constantly volunteering and training with that in mind 3) my faith is important to me and I am trying to teach my boys the important role that God plays in their lives--with no help from my agnostic DH--so the church stuff is another nonnegotiable and 4) this isn't necessarily the real order of my priorities, it's just how they came out.

Part of this can be attributed that I am literally running from my house, which needs repair and renovation, neither of these things I want to address in this iffy economic situation; the other part of it is that I am running from my neighbors and giving my sons lives and friends beyond this street. I'm not saying this is the right way to do this, but it's what's going on, like it or not.

Actually, circling back here, my church stuff is what really gets DH's knickers in a twist. Which is tough, because it's the most important to me, and he's got to figure out a way to accommodate it.

My faith gets me through. A friend sent me this yesterday: Don't tell God how big your storm is; tell your storm how big your God is.

My entire adult life has been a leap of faith. And God has never dropped me.

I'll work it out. I always do.

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