Too Many Thoughts

 I'm having trouble picking a topic. My head is all over the place.

Let's start with the present moment. I am in front of my tree, Younger to my immediate right, sprawled out and watching videos on his laptop. Elder is in the other room, watching one thing on TV and another thing on his laptop (trying not to turn myself inside out with all my angst here).  I took them both to iHop this am, and then made a side quest for younger to relive an early childhood moment or two, then off on a little road trip to get us all out of the house. 

Elder graduated.  He has his associate's degree, made dean's list, and now we need to figure out his "what next". (I've agreed with dad to give this all a rest this week)(Hasn't made the angst go away. I'm just not talking about it.) Younger is enjoying the quiet. I'm looking around at all the stuff that needs to get done and suffering task paralysis. 

Everything needs to get solved now, so nothing is getting done.  Feeling overwhelmed. Which is pretty much my steady-state.

I can't even enjoy the quiet.

I need to stop torturing myself.