The Measure of the Man

 It's been an interesting little while. 

My younger guy just gave me a schooling of where his head is. Over the weekend, we had back to back parties, something that never happens. We left the first early to attend his and his brother's best friend's birthday party.

The schooling happened over interactions. He was all about me and my company for the first one, but the second party, he initiated conversation with a bunch of peers he had never met before.  They quickly found common ground in music.

Which shows me he can. When he wants to. 

Elder followed suit, and had a little more difficulty finding his groove, although he eventually got there. 

Magic. I've been waiting their whole lives for this. 

We chased this with a family gathering Sunday--first in almost a year and a half. That felt awesome. 

Elder and I took off on a road trip early Monday am. He woke me at 5:30 am. He said he had a hard time getting to sleep the night before--it was like Christmas.  He had his music on and I listened to the radio as urban landscapes gave way to farms and open space. And we talked about a lot of things. I learned a lot about the last 10 years from his perspective. And he learned a lot of the same time frame from my point of view. 

That to me was the best part of the trip--how he realized that those teachers who gave him the toughest time helped him the most. And those who didn't--particularly that fifth grade teacher--deserve a particular place in hell for the things done under their watch with their permission. 

But I also learned that even though some of those teachers gave him a hard time for the sake of trying to break him (all that stupid business with his Phillies hat springs to mind), he understood what was happening, if not why.  And that he can call it into question now, that he can identify all the things he's ever been gaslit over, tells me that he will be okay.

People have hurt him. But the people who love him fiercely remind him of his worth. 

And he knows his worth. 

And he helped remind me of mine.