Let Healing Begin

This past week was spent in isolation because illness, but I think the house wide pause was necessary for a few reasons. I find I fall apart when my body senses it has the space to do so. And I often spend the down time recalibrating, because being sick usually means I need to rethink what I’ve been doing. And of course the added realization that time escapes put the necessary fire under my ass to start planning.

I can’t say at the moment what that’s going to look like professionally, because first off, I don’t know, and second of all, every time I think I have a way forward, there’s a plot twist. So presently, I have my ears and eyes open, and that will do for now.

The more important business of planning for family milestones and managing those logistics is priority. Shepherding the boys in the business of managing their own lives is high priority. For once, it feels like we are intentional, at least in this moment when everything is paused and we have some time to plan (as opposed to reacting, which is 90 percent easily of what we do).

I’ve also been doing somewhat heavy lifting/reading via The Body Keeps Score. I can’t read more than 5-10 pages at a time before I need to sit (or walk) with what I’ve read. Probably the single most important piece of information that’s imprinted on me is that The Body Doesn’t Lie. If you have a visceral reaction to anything or anyone, there’s a good reason for it, and until you do the needed work to get to the why, it’s going to keep happening.

It’s not a matter of ‘getting over something.’ If it were as simple as getting over something, I think all of us would in a heartbeat, right? 

Give yourself time and space to heal. You’re on no other timeline but your own.